Currently Listening to: Use Somebody (Kings of Leon)

Its not easy trying to do things that you've lost all interest in doing. No, I'm not talking about writing, I love writing too much. It's the conditions in which I'm writing in that is a kill joy. Now with that removed, laziness steps in.


That being said, I actually am having fun writing my last piece for the magazine. It has something to do with heroes and I guess it's quite a fun subject. I can't say that I haven't had fun working here. I will definitely miss most of the people here.


Everything has been set in motion. It's probable that I won't be in the country by the end of the year. I have lots to take into account. One of it being my parents and the venture I am embarking on. I still fear for a lot of matters that have not been set in stone. Plans are done but it starts with a leap of faith. 


Change is good. I guess.


There is one other matter which weighs heavy on my mind. 


Be clear about one thing: These words ring from the heart.


You can say all you want about not deserving to get hurt but when you hurt others, you deserve all the hurt you can get. I believe that somethings are never to be broken. You are not as innocent as you make yourself out to be, having used somebody (apt ain't it) and discard them when use is no longer required. 


Yeah, I know. I. Don't. Know. Period. And yeah I maybe don't. But I know there are better ways to go about it and I thought that you, a person I placed at a place of respect in my eyes, would know how to go about it. We looked up to you. But yeah. I. Don't. Know. Shit.


And bro (for the last time), You placed yourself as a source of comfort to him only to trample on his feelings. You were supposed to be a brother. Unbreakable codes were broken. Forget codes, it just wasn't an honorable way to do it. He trusted you, the least you could do was ask him. 


I stood up for you, in earnest, because I believed in you. Because I thought you were a bro. I would have stood up for you till the day that I died. For the both of you. 


In both accounts I was wrong. I dunno why it's impacting me the way it is, but it is. So in that I cast the first stone, to the ground. I was quite upset when I set out to write this but it kinda dissolved, and my thoughts probably never mattered in the first place. Plus I don't think the stone deserves it.


Be clear. It not what you did, it's how you did it. I hope that your decision proves to be a fruitful one, for in exchange for it, memories will lay in the past. Today my ties are cut.